When God created Adam and saw it wasn’t good for him to be alone, hence creating Eve, I wonder… did he prepare them for their roles? Did he tell them how to function together? Did he WARN THEM about each other??
I look at my husband and in retrospect of my actions and words at times, I’m ever more grateful for the amount of time he invests in prayer LOL Seriously though. With every morning he rises to go to his prayer corner, I’m so glad He has another Man to talk to about things in life. Including his wife. LOL I’m a simple compound you see from a distance and think, “Oh, I can memorize that. Easy.” Then, when you have to break down the formula and learn each part, “simple compound” doesn’t seem so simple or easy.
I have “great” ideas, desires and other things I think about, some that I share with my husband. I’m sure he longs to see some of those things come to pass or have the means to make all of them happen for me. There are other times when I know it ain’t happening! However, in some moments and times when things occur, I wonder… did I just LEAD my husband and our family into doing that when HE should have led?? *screeching tires*
In Genesis, after Adam and Eve sin, God tells them of their consequences. In one verse, God prophesies or foreshadows the lives and desires of women today:
“To the woman, He said: ‘I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception;
In pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” Genesis 3:16 (NKJV)
The Complete Jewish Bible states the latter as, “Your desire will be toward your husband, but he will rule over you.” The version that threw me for a loop was the NLT which states, “And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.”
Now hold up, God… What’re you tryna say?
Could it be that the struggle we as women have today and have had for years is based on this consequence of sin? Could it be that we as women have and always will have a desire to “lead” our households instead of our husbands because of this God-ordained sentencing? Could it be that God, who gifted us with the ability to multi-task, made us subject to these “one-track” minded males to humble us due to the pride and independence of our foremother Eve… or the pride and independence of our current selves?
We say are marriages our Biblical, but do we as wives tell our husband’s how to lead by talking too much at times? Do we “share our heart” or desires with the ulterior motive of turning their heart in our direction instead of God’s direction (which may not be the same)? Do we just do what we want and apologize later?
OR do we as wives trust God SO much with our husband and his leadership that we do as the Virgin Mary did – hear God, trust God, let God speak to Joseph& make him subject to His leadership, and lead Joseph and Mary prophetically in the direction of birthing our Savior and keeping him alive from murder.
**Note: If you are new here, let me preface ALL of this by saying I am speaking about men of GOD who have placed JESUS as their Lord and Savior. Just wanted to make sure that was understood 😉 If your husband isn’t saved, PRAY! God desires your husband: “The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9 You as his wife will accomplish more on your knees than with your words that may sound naggish. Here’s an applicable verse:
“Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the Word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.” 1 Peter 3:1-2
Some of you are having issues with things I’m stating, and that’s understood. You have your opinions and beliefs, as do I. I challenge you as I have been challenging myself though (and will be until eternity comes). Marriage is 1+1=1 under an amazing covenant of God. It is our marriage that reflects the beautiful relationship between the Church/Body of Christ and Jesus, the Head… whom we are subject to. If this then is the foundation of Christian husbands and wives (as it should be), we MUST look at the Bible and our lives, go to God in prayer with humility, and be the lumpy clay on the Potter’s Wheel if our hearts, minds and actions do not align with His Word and standards.
Since 2013, ESPECIALLY 2015 to the present, God has been challenging my mindset and actions on the Biblical roles of husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, and children. As my sister Tiffany would explain from one of her dreams, God has told me on several occasions, “Esther… shut up and ride!” LOL I’ve had so many things upside down, inside out and things I just wasn’t trying to follow (don’t act like I’m the only one!) I’ve made decisions (baaaaad ones) for the entire family that negatively affected my marriage and children where my husband was NOT in the decision-making process or was minimally involved. Through this journey, God has gripped my heart & soul to fear Him through the honorable roles of wife and mother (hence 2Aiming3Arrows!), growing my trust in each moment. It’s been disgustingly brutal to my flesh but amazingly grace-filled because I KNOW God has been present.
So wives, LET’S DO THIS… Biblically! Let your husband lead. Let’s be humble in heart (and mouth!) when they make a choice “we would’ve NEVER made.” Let’s pray for their relationship with God when they are in despair. Let’s pray for their leadership to be strengthened when failure comes. Let’s serve in love & humility when they
finally ask for our help. Let’s applaud the efforts that they think are minimal. Let’s prophesy and speak life into their faith-filled decisions. Let’s see the blessing in the “curse” of subjection. If he’s not leading or doesn’t desire to, pray for your husband to find His identity in Christ. His leadership benefits us as wives because we are humbled to trust God more. It benefits our husbands because they have to seek God more in their relationship with Him.
We know WE can lead pretty well as women. What’s even BETTER is when we tell our husbands they can lead well too… and we let them.