Aiming a Teenage Arrow

Over the last few weeks, I have asked certain people to be my guest bloggers because of specific wisdom and Biblical insight they have as related to 2aiming3arrows. Well, this week is definitely NO different! You are in for an amazing treat as I welcome my dearly beloved friend & sister, Mrs. Tiffany Walker (www.iguts.org). She is a lover of God with a power-filled and radical message to young people everywhere to give up the sin and walk in righteousness according to GOD’s word and not the world. Today, she blogs as a mother of a teenage arrow in a world where so much compromise abides. She has truth-filled words that I hope ignite parents of teenagers to FIGHT & aim your arrow towards the kingdom of God despite this world’s arsenal. Read. Share. Like. Comment. Thank you, Tiffany!

It is an honor to be the guest blogger for my friend and sister, Esther. I am still an archer in training, but I will attempt to share some advice for the archer aiming teenage children.

My daughter, Mary, is 13 years old. I had Mary before I was married. I received salvation two months before Mary’s 1st birthday. It was at that moment I began aiming my arrow towards Christ. I did not have a full revelation of what I was doing. I did understood it was my responsibility for “how” this child would learn about Christ and serve Him. It was not enough to take her to church and go through the routine of salvation.

Aiming my arrow first started with me. Here is a little background information. After salvation, I was single and I told the Lord I would not date until He sent me my husband. I understood how I dated and who I dated mattered. It would be too long to tell you the story, but her biological father has always been in her life. I got married when Mary was seven years old. Her biological father supports me and my husband as we aim Mary towards the Kingdom of God. It has not always been easy, but I believe in protecting children from “grown people” issues. Here are some things I would like to highlight:

  1. Teach them the word: 2 Timothy 3:16 “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness”

At the end of the day, our words and opinions are worthless compared to the Word of God. I believe in giving our children wisdom, but that wisdom must be rooted and originate from the word of God. Mary is in the 8th grade at a small private school. There was a lot of gossip going around school. Teenage girl drama!!! I took Mary to Proverbs 17:9 “Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.” Mary ended up calling each friend and repenting for being in the middle of gossip. On her own, she also went a step further and went to her teachers. She wanted to be accountable. This is important because gossip is a heart issue. It was not enough to just deal with “what” your child did, but we must deal with the “why”. Aim your children towards accountability, repentance and Godly character. The word of God corrects the heart. When the heart is molded by the Word of God, our children’s lifestyles will align with the word.

  1. Choose their friends and the “when and where” they hang out: Proverbs 13:20 “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”

From the time Mary went to school and was able to talk, she will tell you I taught her to watch who she hangs around. The Word clearly tells us bad company corrupts good character (1 Corinthians 15:33). The best thing we can ever do for our children is to help them choose good friends. I do not do the “drop off at the mall and movie” thing. Sometimes, we set our children up for failure. We skip the time we should be walking next to them and allow them to just figure things out on their own. I believe in the process. We have to teach our children how to choose friends. Ask them hard questions. I do pros and cons with Mary all of the time. Are your friends bringing good things and opportunities into your life or not? Then I walk through the friendship with her. Sleepovers are a whole another blog, but I am very protective and the enemy is so clever. We stick with Nanna’s house and friends we have known for years. Again, it goes back to the process. We cannot allow things to move too fast. Walk through the process with your children and teach them what good friendships look like. If not, we will set our children up for failure.

  1. Social Media…. What? Romans 12:2 “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”nb-li-teen-on-facebook

Confessions of a mother. I am confused!! Why do so many children have facebook and Instagram and whatever else is out there? With so many things just one click away now, it is so important we do not allow our children to be on certain media outlets too soon. I monitor everything my child does and some social media outlets are not for children at all. Mary did not get a phone until middle school. This was based on her maturity. Mary’s phone is for calling and texting. I also will check her phone often and randomly to read text messages etc. Passcode… WHAT? She is not allowed to close room doors in my house, and there is not one phone or iPad I do not have the code for. Again, it’s training. We have a generation that can move through a phone better than they can read and write. The world is training our children to be so entitled. We must be intentional now about teaching our children how to interact with people face to face. We cannot allow the world to dictate what our children do. Children should show a certain maturity. Social Media is a trap if you are not monitoring it. If you are not careful, your child will see and hear things that will open a door to lust, perversion, rebellion and sin.

  1. Seek First the Kingdom of God:

I believe in setting goals for Mary. She is a great student in school, and she is honestly a great little lady. If I teach her to seek first the Kingdom of God, that covers dating, clothing, academics, everything. 2 Timothy 2:22 says, “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.” Teach your children to chase after righteousness, faith, love and peace. The other part of that scripture says, “along with those” doing the same thing. Above all else, we are called to aim our children towards the Kingdom of God. We serve a Righteous and Holy God. We have to teach our children every good and perfect gift is from God.(James 1:17) Do not let your child’s abilities and gifting become their god. I am all for education, college, working, having a “good” job, taking care of your family. But anything we try to do that takes us away from serving God is not worth it. What profits a man to gain the world and lose his soul? I have truly realized that teaching Mary to seek the Kingdom is the best lesson I could ever instill in her.

Like I stated in the beginning, it is not enough for us to take our children to church and allow them to live any kind of way. Train according to the word of God. Live by His word and be an example. Teach and monitor them as they walk through the process. Aim them towards the Kingdom of God. It is not just going to happen. When you teach, you’re setting boundaries and creating the pathway for your child. I pray this helps you and encourages you to aim your arrow toward the mark of a higher calling in Christ Jesus!

walkers“He said to me {Tiffany}, stand up on your feet and I will speak to you…. I am sending you to the {world}, to a rebellious nation that has rebelled against me… say to them, ‘This is what the Sovereign Lord says’…” (From Ezekiel 2:3-4)

I am just a vessel that God has breathed on. As a wife and mother, I open my heart and my mind to be used by Him. I graduated from Meredith College and currently work in the School System full time. I enjoy event planning and teaching. Most importantly, I am a daughter of the Most High and Jesus Christ is the author and finisher of my faith. I pray that what you read leaps off the screen and into your heart. I love the Father because He 1st Loved ME!

2 thoughts on “Aiming a Teenage Arrow

  1. Absolutely amazing! So much truth and courage. It takes courage and righteous boldness to raise children in these last days. You MUST love and fear God above all else.
    Thanks Tiffie & EstherMae

  2. Such a wonderful, wonderful read. I am the mother of a 13 year old and it has been very hard trying to make sure she in influence by the word and not the world.. This article is exactly what I needed to help me get my daughter back on the right track. God bless you!!

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